Thursday, January 17, 2013

Fictional love or real love?

"You want a man, who will lead you down the beach, with his hand over your eyes, just so you can discover the feel of the sand beneath your feet. You want a guy, who will wake you up a dawn, just bursting to talk to you, he can't wait another minute just to find out what you'll say. Am I right?"
I was watching Runaway Bride for the first time today (classic... I don't know why I've never seen it) and this quote just really hit me at my core. What girl wouldn't want a man like this? At first I just tried to shake off the feelings that this moment in the movie evoked by telling myself that this kind of love only exists in movies. At least that is what Hollywood always tries to tell us. They come up with these elaborate tales of men who drop everything that they are doing, simply to see their one true love again. Men who walk for days in the rain, men who give up their dreams because they know that their dreams mean nothing if they are alone, men who will do anything, just to see her smile... I'm sure you can name many more of your favorite romance scenes. But we all think Oh, this could never happen to me.... what guy would want to give up his life for me.... that kind of love doesn't exists. And so, all too often, we settle. We settle for whatever guy happens to give us the slightest bit of attention. Sure, maybe he is a really awesome guy and there is nothing 'wrong' with him, but does he hang on your every word? Does he constantly tell you how much he loves you? How beautiful you are? How you are the best thing that has ever happened to him? My challenge to all of you in the dating world is this: don't settle. 

Women: You are the crown of creation. Don't be afraid to set some kind of standards. Sooner or later, someone will come along who will realize your worth and your dignity and fight for it. I'm not saying you have to wait for "Mr. Perfect", but wait for someone who will really pursue you and figure out what makes you you. Trust me, it will be hard. You're going to get tired of waiting, you're going to hurt, you're going to want to give up. But keep fighting. It will be well worth it in the end. And it's amazing just how much boys turn into men when you make them work for your heart. Allowing a man to pursue you doesn't make you weak: it makes you strong because you know what you deserve.

Men: Fight for your women. Be bold. Don't be afraid to say no to a girl who is simply seeking attention from you. It's not fair to you either. Beware of the fine line of giving your all to a woman, and letting her walk all over you. We need to be called on as well. Set your own standards and allow them to influence the way you pursue and look after the women you love. Recognize the beauty that is before you. Cherish her. It is said that the Trojan War was started because of Helen, a woman, so beautiful, that the Greeks wanted to win her back from the Trojans who had taken her as their queen. If you want to pursue a woman, fight for her... literally or figuratively... We all just want to be "the face that launched 1,000 ships."

All I'm trying to say, is that while finding love isn't easy, that doesn't mean it's not real. I certainly have my fair share of cynicism, but I know that it is only because I'm afraid I won't find it. It's out there somewhere. And until then, I pray that the Lord will guide me and reveal pieces of my story in His own timing. He will lead you too if you ask Him. Allow Him to write your love story for you, and I can guarantee that it will be better than anything you could have come up with on your own. The way I look at it, if you haven't been successful yet, then what is there to lose?

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